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HDD Goodie Bag: Your Horror Blu-rays For Halloween 2011
Mon Oct 31, 2011 at 02:35 PM ETTags: Halloween, M. Enois Duarte, Fun Stuff (all tags)
Just like we do every year around this time, High-Def Digest has scraped together another maggot-infested candy bowl of fun to help you prepare for Halloween!
What's in the Goodie Bag? --- Horror Blu-rays for the 2011 Halloween Season!
by M. Enois Duarte (The HDD Crypt Keeper)
Greetings, boils and ghouls! With the Hell-idays finally around the corner, High-Def Die-gest decided to resurrect another selection of gory treats to celebrate the feast-ivities. This year it seems, we've had more choices to dissect than last, but sadly, most the rotting cadavers on this year's slab leave much to be desired.
But never fear, kiddies, I've still managed to scrap up a terror list of putrid horror tales that are sure set the mood just right. The scary stories are separated into three stomach-churning categories and listed in alphabetical order. The queasy gathering is organ-ized according to each title delivering a spooky atmosphere, offering you creeps the best variety in scares and creepy laughter. So, without further ado . . .
Frights! Camera! Hack-tion!
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MILD DECOMPOSITION |
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It may not feature any undead monsters or unstoppable psychopaths, but Sam Peckinpah's revenge flick definitely belongs in this horror list. It's a masterful piece of suspense cinema that patiently and methodically builds to the point of boiling, generating a tense, visceral reaction that's scary on its own. It is utterly brilliant the way the director creates a frightening experience of apprehension and fear as we watch a couple be ruthlessly terrorized by a small band of local bullies. Tension grows from a feeling of helplessness and being an out-of-towner, mixed with some western motifs where Dustin Hoffman's character continues to his pursuit for civilized order amid the violence. 'Straw Dogs' is an excellent thriller for those looking for a different kind of scare.
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MOULDY AROUND THE CORNERS |
| POLTERGEIST II: THE OTHER SIDE Since we're already covering other films with a ghostly haunting as the main attraction, let us continue the trend with Brian Gibson's entertaining follow-up to an 80s horror favorite. Though not as successful — or good, for that matter — as its predecessor, the sequel still offers some good atmosphere of the supernatural. Besides, the movie is best remembered as the thriller which introduced horror fanatics to Reverend Henry Kane, the unearthly and bloodcurdling cult leader dressed in black, looking like a physical manifestation of every child's nightmare. Then there's also Zelda Rubenstein as the wonderfully memorable psychic Tangina, and she's always cool to watch. Enjoy it with the original for a fun night of the paranormal.
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Granted, this is actually a television series, not a movie. But this is a damn fine television series, envisioning an apocalypse overrun by zombies. And zombies are always fun. Reanimated from the imagination of Frank Darabont, a rather well-respected filmmaker who loves adapting Stephen King stories, the show kicks off with a bang and runs in a frightened panic through the streets of Atlanta with both barrels loaded. But the real kicker, other than the continual display of zombie mayhem with lots of blood and gore, is the surprisingly engaging drama of the survivors. As tensions rise from within the ranks and strangers are forced to work together, each episode slowly intensifies their dilemma and ends with a great season closer that leaves viewers in anticipation for the show's return.
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A FESTERING, PUTRID STENCH |
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When talking about bad movies, we simply have to squeeze in at least one Nicolas Cage movie somewhere in there. This year's hilarious — sorry, spooky horror tale is actually supposed to be a truly strange reworking of Ingmar Bergman's immortal classic 'The Seventh Seal.' That only should already stop most viewers and reconsider watching this drek. But with the fact that it stars the man with the best hairdos in the entire biz, curiosity compels us to watch this train wreck. And the crazy part is, 'Season of the Witch' is actually a side-splitting thrill ride. It completely fails to scare, but the movie has some slight entertainment value in its sheer badness. Oh, and Ron Perlman costars, surprisingly adding some good humor.
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Why not finish the list — which as always is only an opinionated suggestion, not an absolute — with at least one "so bad, it's good" entry. In 'Vamp,' what's not to love in a movie that prominently displays Grace Jones as its star attraction, dressed like she's joined the circus. Actually, as the vampire queen of an underground nightclub who owns a waterbed filled with blood, Jones is quite good in this strange horror comedy. It also stars that kid from 'My Bodyguard' and the guy who played the bully next to Robert Downey, Jr. in 'Weird Science' as two college guys on the hunt for a stripper. Imagine on your own how Jones fits in all this. Then imagine the gut-busting silliness of watching a tough street-gang made entirely of albinos. It's bad, but also amusing for a fun Halloween night.
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WANTS FOR NEXT YEAR (Now, This is What I Can Sink My Teeth Into) Here's hoping for the best and that studios will take note of what horror aficionados really hunger for and of what will truly please our insatiable appetites. Some of these are available on Blu-ray in other parts of the world, but they're on this list in hopes of one day receiving announcement of a North American release. Please share your own wish lists in the forum. All the Boys Love Mandy Lane, Alone in the Dark (1982), The Beyond, The Birds, Black Sabbath, Blade, Blood and Black Lace, Bride of Frankenstein, The Brood, The Burning, Candyman, Cannibal Apocalypse, The Changeling, The Children (1980), Dellamore Dellamorte (Cemetery Man), Demons, Don't Look Now, Dracula (1931), Eden Lake, The Fog (1980), Frankenstein (1931), Freaks, From Beyond, The Funhouse, Ginger Snaps, The Haunting (1963), Hell Night, Horror of Dracula, The Howling, The Hunger, Idle Hands, Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956), It's Alive (1974), Jaws, Jeepers Creepers, The Legend of Hell House, Martyrs, The Mask of Satan (Black Sunday), May, Night of the Living Dead (1968), Nightmare City, Nosferatu (1922), Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979), Oasis of the Zombies, Peeping Tom, Pet Sematary, Phantasm, Prom Night (1980), Re-Animator, Rear Window, The Ring, Rosemary's Baby, Scanners, The Serpent and the Rainbow, The Stepford Wives (1975), Shadow of the Vampire, Sleepaway Camp, A Tale of Two Sisters, The Tenant (1976), They Live, What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?, White Zombie, Zombie Lake. |
HDD Goodie Bag: Your Horror Blu-rays For Halloween 2010
Tue Oct 12, 2010 at 03:00 PM ETTags: M. Enois Duarte, Halloween (all tags)
In preparation for Halloween, High-Def Digest has scraped together a maggot-infested candy bowl of fun!
What's in the Goodie Bag? --- Horror Blu-rays for this Halloween Season!
by M. Enois Duarte (The HDD Crypt Keeper)
The Hell-idays are upon us once again, kiddies! That time of the year when we hang rotting cadavers by their lips and their hairs. The little monsters rise from their graves to haunt the streets in search of gory treats. It's no secret this is the season I cherish the most - what with the sights and sounds wringing in the New Year. I normally like to kick things off with a killer party, but this time around, I've had a few cut backs due to our economic dissection.
I tell ya, boils and ghouls, times are tough these days. I've even enforced some strenuous spending guts on my own crypt theater so as to make ends meat. But it doesn't seem nearly as bad as this year's horrid selection of putrid horror tales. Although we've seen more released this time around than last we met, the choices are rather slim pickings. Not exactly the sort to really deliver the frights and howls, with a chunk of the new stuff being the worst of the slab.
Nonetheless, High-Def Die-gest has invited your pal, the Crypt Keeper, to exorcise another terror list in order to celebrate the feast-ivities. While the spooky stories are separated into three stomach-churning categories and in alphabetical order, the queasy gathering is organ-ized according to each title's contribution to horror cinema - those which made a loud ruckus with a couple of personal favorites sprinkled on top, offering you creeps the best variety in scares and creepy laughter. So, without further ado . . .
Frights! Camera! Hack-tion!
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MILD DECOMPOSITION (Grade A Top Choice Flesh) |
| A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET (1984) By the time Wes Craven jumped into the slasher craze of the early eighties, 'Halloween' and 'Friday the 13th' already had franchises going for themselves. The filmmaker smartly exploited the conventions of the genre and surprisingly turned them into something completely new and exciting with 'A Nightmare on Elm Street.' Craven's homicidal maniac can talk back and loves toying with his prey! Horribly disfigured and a victim of parent vigilantism, Freddy Krueger also invades the most intimate and private area of teenhood: our dreams. Wielding a glove with finger knives, Krueger not only runs after you while spewing his sadistic wisecracks, but this freaky-looking bugger comes with his own nursery rhyme. Today, the name has become synonymous with the horror genre.
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While the aforementioned 'The Exorcist' remains the most frightening film ever made, 'Psycho' will be forever remembered for altering the course of horror movies. Leave it to Alfred Hitchcock to create something with such indelible ramifications. The classic masterpiece has left such an immense impact that the maestro is now thought of as a brilliant director of the genre even though this is his first and arguably only "true" horror film. Previously, scary movies were about grotesque, fantastical creatures, but this complex psychological chiller brought the monsters closer to home. For the first time, audiences were met by a fiend, Norman Bates, who was courteous, friendly, the next-door neighbor you trusted and thought was innocent, until those final, shocking, crucial moments. Hitchcock's 'Psycho' is literally the mother (all pun intended) of the modern horror movie.
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MOULDY AROUND THE CORNERS (It's Still Good, Just Pick Off the Maggots) |
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When a prominent film critic basically summarizes a horror/splatter movie by quoting from philosopher Thomas Hobbes that it is "poor, nasty, brutish and short," you know you're in for something special. That is, as long as "special" means brutally shocking and unnervingly gory. With special effects from celebrated make-up artist Giannetto De Rossi, French director Alexandre Aja made a name for himself in this twisted tale of sadistic romance about two college friends on vacation who are chased by a vicious psychopath. Where the 'Hostel' and 'Saw' films failed, 'High Tension' succeeds by providing gorehounds with a simple but very important concept: a story. If the night calls for something to cringe at and jolt the senses, then this special platter of splatter makes for good date night entertainment.
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Of all the movies since 'Blair Witch' launched the "found-footage" subgenre, 'Paranormal Activity' has really been the only one to come close to repeating its predecessor's success. Personally, I much prefer 'REC,' its sequel, and 'Cloverfield,' but this low-budget sleeper took the nation by storm with endless viral hype and word of mouth. In fact, all the brouhaha surrounding the demonic haunting of a young couple's home became part of the event in itself. Even more surprising is that the movie turning out to be somewhat creepily entertaining, even more so than a story about a witch in the woods. It's a fun and freaky supernatural flick which builds tension with setting and situation rather than special effects, effective because of everything we don't see. Scary enough to scare Spielberg (Google it!).
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Even in these hard economic times, someone will always find ways to make a killing on the unfortunate. During a zombie apocalypse, what better way to relieve the stress of survival and forget the panic of being eaten alive by a horde of the undead than by visiting an amusement park called 'Zombieland.' There are emotionally distraught cowboys named Woody, pathetically insecure College virgins from Columbus, Ohio, and two con-artist sisters that might as well be conjoined at the hips. The comical thrill rides include carnival shooting games, demented clowns, and a special appearance by legendary performance artist Bill Murray. The list of rules and guidelines for staying alive in the theme park are long and rather strictly enforced, but it's all in the name of providing only the best form of fun and enjoyment for the whole family.
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A FESTERING, PUTRID STENCH |
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Oh, dear GAWD!! The mere thought of having to sit through this idiotic mess once more is enough to induce nightmares and panic attacks. As a survivor of the massacre in Alaska, Stella goes all Val Helsing on bloodsuckers. In Los Angeles, she earns the opportunity to work with a small ragged group of vampire hunters and destroy the Queen Bee, Lilith. Unfortunately, standing in their way is a host of bad acting, lame set designs, a floundering script with insufferable dialogue, and some of the most dreadfully amateur direction this side of 'Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus.' But even that Syfy debacle had better production values than this offensive atrocity. At one point, I half expected Wesley Snipes to walk into the picture, armed only with a pair of sunglasses and his kick-ass martial arts. 'Twilight' makes 'Dark Days' look like a high school drama club production.
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Speaking of talentless hacks, Diablo Cody is showing signs of being the next M. Night Shyamalan - a one-hit wonder. For her second major Hollywood feature, Cody takes a stab at the popular girl in school by singling her out as the demon she truly is - a brainless, artificial, materialistic, heartless bitch with a really, really big mouth. It makes sense then that Megan Fox is perfect for the role. In another attempt to seem culturally relevant, the stripper-turned-writer infuses the entire picture with her own blend of nonsensical teen speak and adds an identity crisis since it can't decide if it's a horror or a comedy. It aspires for B-movie status with smarts, but true genre aficionados know there is nothing new about 'Jennifer's Body.' Unfortunately, the flick is too shallow to ever be taken serious and will never attain the cult status it so desperately begs to attain.
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| A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET (2010) Another rehash from Michael Bay's Platinum Dunes is proof positive that looks are not enough to make a good scary movie. Samuel Bayer makes his feature-length debut in this reimagining of a beloved genre icon, and he's the movie's best feature, providing an otherwise bland production with a sinister tone and quality. Although Jackie Earle Haley deserves some credit for attempting a role unquestionably meant only for Robert Englund, this Freddy Krueger is better to lull you to sleep than induce horrific nightmares. And the attempt also at making the maniac with finger-knives look like a true burn victim fails to draw some scares. In a film about disturbing dreams that kill, reality seems like the last thing we would need. But with such a terrible cast of actors in the forefront, perhaps inducing comas is the filmmaker's point.
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To be perfectly honest, 'Troll 2' is on the list mostly for shits and giggles, and it should be watched precisely for that. The independently-financed horror dreck was mostly ignored during its theatrical run and almost immediately received cult status for its sheer awfulness. The flick is known for not featuring a single troll or even being remotely related to its predecessor, despite what its title may indicate. It has since grown in popularity for its terribleness, but most of the attention is due to the movie's child star directing a documentary about its devoted following called 'Best Worst Movie.' Personally, there are way worse things to watch, like 'The Thing with Two Heads' or 'The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies' (now, that's a good bad movie!), but 'Troll 2' is still all kinds of awful stinkiness and great for a Halloween laugh.
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WANTS FOR NEXT YEAR (Now, This is What I Can Sink My Teeth Into) The list may look a bit daunting and comprehensive (this is actually the short version!!), but this past year saw quite an abundance of scary movies released in high definition. So, here's hoping for the best and that studios will take note of what horror aficionados really hunger for and of what will truly please our insatiable appetites. Some of these are available on Blu-ray in other parts of the world. But since they're region locked, this list is offered in hopes of one day receiving announcement of a North American release. Please share your own wish lists in our forums. All the Boys Love Mandy Lane, Alone in the Dark (1982), The Beyond, The Birds, Black Sabbath, Blade, Blood and Black Lace, Braindead (Dead Alive), Bride of Frankenstein, The Brood, The Burning, Candyman, Cannibal Apocalypse, The Changeling, The Children (1980), Dellamore Dellamorte (Cemetery Man), Dementia 13, Demons, Les Diabolique, Don't Look Now, Dracula (1931), Dressed to Kill (1980), Eden Lake, The Fog (1980), Frankenstein (1931), Freaks, Fright Night, From Beyond, The Funhouse, Ginger Snaps, The Haunting (1963), Hell Night, Horror of Dracula, The Howling, The Hunger, Idle Hands, Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956), It's Alive (1974), Jaws, Jeepers Creepers, The Legend of Hell House, Martyrs, The Mask of Satan (Black Sunday), May, Night of the Living Dead (1968), Nightmare City, Nosferatu (1922), Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979), Oasis of the Zombies, Peeping Tom, Pet Sematary, Phantasm, Prom Night (1980), Re-Animator, Rear Window, The Ring, Rosemary's Baby, Scanners, Scream, The Serpent and the Rainbow, The Stepford Wives (1975), Shadow of the Vampire, Sleepaway Camp, A Tale of Two Sisters, The Tenant, They Live, What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?, Zombi 2 White Zombie, Zombie Lake. THE LEFTOVERS (just because they didn't make it to the main course, doesn't mean they can't be enjoyed still) 2001 Maniacs, The Collector, The Crazies (1973), Dreamscape, The Eclipse, Forbidden World, The Fourth Kind, Frozen, Galaxy of Terror, The Girl Next Door (2007), The House of the Devil, Humanoids from the Deep, Jacob's Ladder, Piranha (1978), Puppet Master, The Relic, The Skeleton Key, Thir13en Ghosts/House of Wax, The Toolbox Murders (1978) AND OTHER UNMENTIONABLES Abandoned, After.Life, The Alphabet Killer, Dark Nature, Don't Look Up, Freeway Killer, The Killing Room, Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus, Parasomnia, Red Dragon, Triangle, Uncle Sam, Vampyres, Wolf Creek Please note the following titles are set for release after the publication of this list and we eagerly await their arrival: Altitude, And Soon the Darkness, Children of the Corn (2009), Cronos, Crowley, Damned by Dawn, Daughters of Darkness, The Disappearance of Alice Creed, Fingerprints, Ghost Machine, It Waits, Lost Boys: The Thirst, Mega Piranha, Mirrors 2, Night of the Demons (2009), S&Man, Staunton Hill, Tremors, Prey, Vampire Circus. |

