‘True Blood’ 3.09 Recap: “Everything Ends, Even the Immortals”

Yes, I know, I’ve moaned here previously about the introduction of Fairies to the mythology of ‘True Blood’ this season. I’ve said that I’m disappointed the show’s writers chose to be faithful to this aspect of the Charlaine Harris book series, and that I’ve tried to savor Fairy-free episodes, such as last week’s. Sure enough, the Fairies are back this week, and I’m kind of annoyed by that. However… and this is a really big however… ‘Everything is Broken’ more than makes up for that with at least two scenes of such exquisite awesomeness that I’ll forgive this series just about anything now. Really, I was cheering at the end, it’s that good.

We’ll get to that in a minute. First, let’s look at some of the earlier highlights, not necessarily in the order they appear in the episode. We’ll break it down by character.


The “V-Feds” led by official vampire spokeswoman Nan Flanagan arrive at Fangtasia to arrest Eric for complicity in the murder of the Magister. They force him to testify right then and there before a mini tribunal from the Vampire Authority (who we only see from the back of the heads) via web cam. What’s weird about this scene is that Nan sets up two web cams, which continually rotate their views back and forth between her and Eric. You’d think she’d just point one camera at herself and the other at Eric. Why do the Authority need to see both sides of her face at the same time? It’s odd.

Eric spills the beans on everything that’s been going on. Everything. He tells the Authority all about Russell and the werewolves, the slaughter of his own family in Viking times, Russell’s marriage to Queen Sophie-Ann, and the murder of the Magister. He expects that they will have to take action against Russell now.

Nan thinks he’s making it all up to waste her time. She makes repeated references about needing to fly to Portland to campaign for passage of the VRA, the Vampire Rights Amendment. Eventually, the Authority come to a conclusion that it will be best for them to disavow any knowledge of these events and sweep it all under the rug. They’re afraid that public knowledge of this sort of vampire in-fighting will look bad politically and prevent passage of the VRA. Eric asks what will happen with Russell, and they unofficially order him to take care of it… off the books. He has clearance to take Russell out, but he has to do it on his own. They won’t provide any assistance. Eric worries that Russell is three times his age and much more powerful.

Sookie & Bill

We pick up with Sookie in the shower trying to wash off some of the blood from her confrontation with the werewolves. The scene has several obvious body-double shots, which is strange because Anna Paquin has certainly never been reluctant to show nudity before (including at the end of last week’s episode). Bill joins her for some bloody shower sex.

Afterwards, they go downstairs, where a dead werewolf is lying in the middle of the floor. Sookie is nonplussed, but says, “Just once, I’d like to not find a dead body in my house.”. Geez, if I were Bill, I might be offended by that!

They remove the body (this after Sookie had just cleaned herself up, too). Then Sookie confronts Bill about the file he’s been keeping on her. He claims that he’s been researching her family in order to find out just what she really is, hoping that knowledge will be able to protect her.

Bill gets his answer that night. As he’s sleeping under the house, he wakes up to water dripping on his face. He lifts the floorboards and steps into the Fairy garden. (It’s the pond water that was dripping down to him.) Apparently, he’s so filled with Sookie’s blood that he could enter the (very soft focus) Fairy realm. The sunlight there also doesn’t harm him. Claudine sees him there and freaks out a little. She assumes that he’s killed Sookie. He protests otherwise, but isn’t terribly convincing after he can’t help himself from popping out his fangs and trying to bite her. She repels him with a blast of light. Bill asks, “What in God’s name are you?”

We cut away there without seeing any more of the conversation. However, later in the episode, Bill tells Sookie where he’d been and announces that he knows what she is. Then that scene ends without him saying. To be continued next week. I’m fairly annoyed that the show’s producers are trying to play coy with this whole Fairy business, as if they expect that they can keep it a secret for another episode. Do they not realize that anyone curious can just hit up Google for spoilers on the book series and find the answer in about 10 seconds? Let’s just come out with it already.


Sookie’s cousin Hadley tells Sookie all about Queen Sophie-Ann, and warns her that Russell is coming after her. She has her young son Hunter with her, whom she has kidnapped from the boy’s father. She’s terrified that Hunter can read minds like Sookie, because that would put his life in danger. Sookie manages to confirm it. Hadley grabs the kid and goes on the run.

Lafayette & Jesus

Gay Jesus has a jaguar tattoo on his chest. Hmmm, will this be significant later? He convinces Lafayette’s mother to come back with him to the nursing home. That’s about it for this storyline.

Sam & Tommy

Tommy spends most of the episode pushing Sam’s buttons. He cavorts around with some naked bimbo in the middle of the night, making a racket that upsets neighbors Arlene & Terry. When Sam yells at him, Tommy accuses him of being just like their dad. The next day at work, he tells Sam that he lets people walk all over him, when really it’s Tommy doing the walking. Basically, Tommy’s a little punk-ass bitch.

Arlene & Holly

Arlene continue to have a bad time at work. Now she thinks that Tommy’s been stealing her tips (which he probably has). They have a fight in the restaurant, which Sam has to break up.

Weird-looking new waitress Holly has a unique ability to get people to confide in her. Arlene breaks down and tells her all about Rene and the baby. She believes it’s an evil child and that Terry will leave her when he finds out. Holly suggests that she get an abortion, but Arlene thinks that’s a sin and won’t consider it… yet.

Hoyt & Jessica

Hoyt brings new girlfriend Summer to Merlotte’s. She brings her doll collection with them. When Summer goes the bathroom, he talks to Jessica and admits that he hates Summer. When Jessica asks why he continues to go out with her, Hoyt says that it beats sitting at home thinking about how much he loves her (Jessica). This makes Jessica cry. Tommy, who thinks he has a shot with Jessica, reads this all wrong and puts on a show of picking a fight with Hoyt until Sam (again) breaks it up.

Jason & Crystal

Crystal’s fiancé Felton finds her at Jason’s house. She pretends that Jason kidnapped and raped her, which really confuses Jason. She and Jason manage to knock Felton out. She convinces Jason to tie him up (because he can get out of handcuffs, she claims). They leave him tied to a tree in the woods with some vials of V in his pocket and make an anonymous call to the police. The next day, when Jason goes to work at the police station, he learns that the cop who responded to the call was beaten to within an inch of his life. Jason talks to Andy and pins this on the meth house

He’s pretty proud of this scheme he’s cooked up. But when he boasts about it to Crystal, she’s really pissed with him about it.

Crystal’s father shows up at Merlotte’s looking for the girl. Sam orders him to leave. When he doesn’t, Sam lets loose all the pent up anger that’s been building in him and beats the living crap out of the man. As Lafayette and Jesus cart him off to the hospital, Crystal gets in the truck and tells Jason that they’re through. She has to side with her kin.

Tara & Jason: Awesome Scene #1

Tara is still suffering from PTSD. Lafayette recommends that she see a shrink or at least find someone to talk to. Tara makes her way to a rape survivors’ group, where she finds weird-looking Holly. Holly tells a horrific story about how, at her previous job, she was raped by a co-worker for five hours straight. But she seems to be better now. Tara is still too traumatized to open up.

How can this possibly lead to something awesome, you ask? It sounds bleak and horrible. Well…

Franklin is back. Yes, as I predicted, Tara didn’t kill him when she bashed his brains in. She neglected to decapitate him. Now he’s back and he’s really pissed. Tara’s having a full blown breakdown and tells him to just kill her, because at least she’ll be done with him then. Franklin is heartbroken by this, but that’s not going to stop him from killing her… until Jason intervenes.

Jason shows up with a shotgun and warns Franklin off. Franklin scoffs, and reminds Jason that vampires can’t be killed by guns. At which point Jason blasts him and Franklin explodes into a huge bloody pulp! Because Jason was shooting wooden bullets he stole from the Church of the Sun!! YESSSSSSSS!!!

R.I.P. Franklin.

I’m a little torn in how I feel about Tara needing to be rescued by a man. I feel like she needed to face up to her demon and take care of Franklin on her own. Of course, she tried that in Mississippi and it still left her a wreck. If she does have to be saved by someone else, it feels right that it should be Jason, who she was in love with for so long and who still feels protective of her.

King Russell: Awesome Scene #2

That was great, but this is the real capper.

Russell has come completely unhinged by Talbot’s death. He scoops up the puddle of gore that was his former husband and carries it around with him in a crystal urn that he talks to. He tries to hunt down Eric, and mistakenly assumes that the Vampire Authority is protecting him (when they’re really interrogating him). So Russell concocts an all-new plan to take care of all his problems at once.

After Nan finishes with Eric, she gets in a limo for the airport. A TV in the car plays a news broadcast about the VRA. The anchorman looks distracted. As well he should be, because suddenly, live on air, Russell swoops in behind him and rips the man’s spine out on camera. He tosses the corpse aside and sits at the anchor desk, still clutching a chunk of the spine. He declares to the world that vampires should not seek equality with humans, because humans are nothing more than cattle. He denounces the Authority and any attempts to mainstream into human life. “Mine is the true face of vampires,” he proclaims.

And… and… and…. “We will eat you, after we eat your children. Now time for the weather… Tiffany…”, he smiles to camera.


This scene is outstanding. I think it’s safe to say that Russell has completely derailed the VRA. Going public with his war against humanity is also going to make it very difficult for Eric to take him out quietly, as the Authority had hoped.

Since his introduction, Russell has been always a very fun, juicy villain. This really takes it over the top in a wonderful way. For this scene alone, ‘Everything is Broken’ may be the best episode of ‘True Blood’ ever. Yes, even with the Fairies.

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