Bonus View Contest: Make a Halo Haiku, Win Some Red vs. Blue!

It’s contest time, folks! Do you love videogames? Do you love comedy? Do you just plain love winning stuff? We’re giving away the entire 6-disc DVD set of ‘Red vs. Blue,’ and it couldn’t be any simpler to get it. All we want is for you to come up with 17 great syllables relating to ‘Halo’.

To win the contest, you’ll need to write a haiku about ‘Halo.’ For the purposes of this contest, your haiku must be in the standard 5-7-5 format, meaning you’ve got a total of 17 syllables to work with. (5 syllables in the first line, 7 syllables in the second line, 5 syllables in the third line.) For example, here’s a haiku I cooked up:

Why, plasma grenade
Must you always stick to me?
I hate exploding

And here’s one from Josh for good measure:

Covenant bodies
Flying through the air. Love that
Gravity Hammer!

Entries that don’t follow this format cannot win. All haikus must be limited to only one stanza in length.

The haiku doesn’t have to be funny, but it does have to be related to ‘Halo’. If it’s not specific to ‘Halo,’ then it should at least relate to the franchise or the experience in some way.  A haiku about multiplayer gaming is fine, but a haiku about Mario just won’t fly. Post your haiku in the comments by July 6th and you’re good to go. After the 6th, no more entries will be accepted. I’ll announce the results on Monday, July 12th.

The prize is the new ‘Red vs. Blue: The Blood Gulch Chronicles – The First Five Seasons‘ 6-disc DVD set, which carries an MSRP of $59.95. You’ll also get a ‘Red vs. Blue’ T-shirt (Large), plus some buttons and bumper stickers from the guys at Rooster Teeth.

If you’ve never seen ‘Red vs. Blue,’ then you’ve been missing out on some amazing stuff. It’s a web-based comedy series based on, and created in, the ‘Halo’ games. Almost all of the episodes were created entirely in multiplayer modes of the games, with video editing and voiceover work creating the story. But most importantly, it’s funny. I mean, really funny.

Game-based humor is easy to do, but it’s hard to do well. For every Penny Arcade, there are a hundred other videogame based sites that just can’t pull it off. ‘Red vs. Blue’ does it flawlessly. The show starts by getting to the very root of the multiplayer problem and then building from there. If my words of praise aren’t enough, you can always check the series out for yourself. Start with the first episode and go from there. You’ll be hooked in no time.

This contest is only open to entrants from the domestic United States. We will not ship internationally (whether you’re a U.S. citizen or not). Employees of High-Def Digest or Internet Brands and their families are not eligible. Standard contest rules and conditions apply. Oh, and if you won our last contest, you can’t win this one. Sorry! (You may get an Honorable Mention, though.)

Only one entry per person allowed. You may choose to rescind an entry if you come up with a better haiku later, but you run the risk that I may like the older one better. Winners will be chosen at my own subjective discretion.

Sadly, we only have one copy of this prize pack to give away. So there can only be one winner, and no Runners Up this time.

Good luck to everyone who enters!

[The idea for this contest was inspired by the Topless Robot blog, which holds awesome and hilarious haiku contests regularly.]


  1. steve

    Master Chief and friends
    Take on the Covenant filth.
    Grunt heads A-sploding!

    I Pwnzor teh n00bz!
    All Ur Baze R belong 2 Us!
    I have 1337 Haxxorz!

  2. Andrew DeVore

    Caboose tries to help
    But then he kills church again
    And then blames Tucker

  3. Godstar

    Ug, miscounted the first line (2nd attempt):

    My love, Cortana,
    her whispering loneliness,
    echoes within me.

  4. David

    Spelled Cortana wrong…

    Chief and Cortana
    cruisin’ suave, drivin’ a hog,
    no care to espy.

  5. Ken Machacek

    The last words I hear:
    “Eat my sticky grenade, noob!”
    Pwned by grade schooler.

  6. Turd Furgeson

    Near Peppered Like Beef

    “Missed Me, Master Queef!” I Speak

    As I Wear Stained Briefs