Fifty Shades Darker

Contest: Win ‘Fifty Shades Darker’ on Blu-ray

Yes, we’re really doing this. We’re giving away the ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ sequel ‘Fifty Shades Darker‘ on Blu-ray. Don’t pretend you’re not curious.

I’m not going to lie, when first offered this particular movie to use as a contest prize, a fair amount of debate arose as to whether it fit the demographics of our site. To hell with that, I say. I bet some of our readers would relish the chance to watch and mock it ironically‚Ķ especially if it’s free! Even if you don’t enjoy it, you can always give it away and inflict the suffering on someone else afterwards.

Also, if I’m not mistaken, the movie promises boobies and butts. That’s got to be worth something.

“How can I win this glorious prize?” you ask. All you have to do is participate in our photo caption contest by giving us a funny or clever caption for the following image. Click to enlarge:

Insert witty caption here

For example: “You were so right. We’re definitely not going to want to show our faces in public again after this fiasco.”

Go ahead, do your worst.

We have two copies of the Blu-ray to give away. The winners will be chosen at our own subjective discretion based on whichever responses we enjoy the most. Entries are limited to 10 per person. That should give you plenty of opportunity to craft a good submission, but will also help us to avoid any potential appearance of awarding prizes based on volume rather than quality. (Please heed this limit. You will be taken out of consideration if you submit more than 10 entries.) All entries must be submitted in the Comments section of this blog post. Please do not attempt to email them to me.

This contest is only open to entrants from the domestic United States. We will not ship internationally (whether you’re a U.S. citizen or not). Employees of High-Def Digest or Internet Brands and their families are not eligible. Standard contest rules and conditions apply. People who have won any of our previous contests within the past one year are also not eligible to win, but may get Honorable Mentions.

The deadline for entry is end of day on Thursday, May 11th. The winners will be announced the following week. Good luck!


  1. NJScorpio

    1 – “I thought you said you were into kinky stuff, like role playing.”

    “I am, but…”

    “Hoot hoot, baby. Got any mice for mommy?”

    “This isn’t really sexy.”

    “Who’s a bad boy? Have you been polluting?”


    “Are you my wizard, baby?”

  2. NJScorpio

    2 – “After what happened yesterday, I’m not letting go of your hand until we are done filming. I know you don’t care about your contract, but I don’t get paid unless we finish shooting!”

  3. NJScorpio

    3 – After criticisms that the last ’50 Shades’ movie wasn’t ‘dark’ enough, franchises merge and Anastasia Steele beings pursuing Zack Snyder’s Bruce Wayne.

    She leaves him when he insists on calling her Martha.

  4. Warner

    “You mean you are not James Spader?! And this is not The Secretary sequel?!” For a little mask, it was good at hiding the truth.

  5. Jim

    He: “I’m wearing flannel long-johns underneath.”
    She: “I’m wearing a burlap bra.”

    He: “Oh, so kinky!”

  6. Plissken99

    Him: Don’t look down.
    Her: why?
    Him: The floor is completely covered in jizz and sawdust.


    I can’t wait for the party to be over so we can go back home and revise our relationship contract.

  8. Csm101

    Anastasia: “Let’s go back to your place and into that red room where you commit all kinds of kinky and debaucherous acts.”
    Christian: “You mean my home theater? Sorry, no girls are allowed to touch those toys!”

  9. Csm101

    Anastasia: “I’m not wearing any panties…”
    Christian: “Thats ’cause I’m wearing them.”

  10. Csm101

    Anastasia: “I’m wearing all your favorite shades of grey.”
    Christian: “Thanks for telling me, I can’t see shit in this mask.”

  11. Csm101

    At first glance this is a top notch hi-def transfer, but upon closer examination one can see the egregious use of noise reduction has completely erased the buttons off of Dornan’s tux shirt.

  12. Timcharger

    “See behind this mask, I’m now NOT YOUR CHRISTIAN anymore. Huh, huh, get it?”

  13. Timcharger

    “You have no idea how dirty. If we had a blacklight, this place would like a Jackson Pollack painting.”

  14. Timcharger

    “I got an idea. We can make them completists double dip by releasing a 50 shades in black & white edition.”

  15. Timcharger

    She: “Really? That mask makes you look like you’re in blackface? You’re gonna make #50ShadesSoWhite start trending.”

  16. Timcharger

    He: “So let’s keep pretending the fact that I’m filthy rich, and that has no bearing to this ‘love’ story.”
    She: “Sure and you can keep calling me Melania, too.”

  17. Timcharger

    She: “Don’t worry, it’s not fur. I humanely collected it from naturally shedding emo girl hair.”

  18. Alex

    Every face a different shade (50 of them). . .
    Look around – there’s another mask behind you!

  19. Csm101

    “Mmmm Christian, this fancy party is making me so wet!”
    “I’m wet too, these hors d’ oeuvres they’re serving just made me shart.”

  20. Deaditelord

    Anastasia: “You are so going to think about that other woman’s ass when we have sex later tonight aren’t you?”
    Christian: “Yes… Yes I am.”

    • Deaditelord

      Christian: “Anastasia, does the phrase “Baby Got Back” mean anything to you because… damn.”

  21. Csm101

    “Let’s get outta here Anna. I refuse to pay seven dollars per drink. What a ripoff!”