Well, no surprise here. Jack Bauer won the last round of TV Madness. Even though Xena battles supernatural gods on a daily basis, she was no match for TV’s preeminent badass. In the other battle, MacGyver pulled what appears to me as an upset over ‘Dark Angel’ Max Guevara. He saves the day with household material and never carries a gun. She’s a genetically engineered ass-kicker. It was close, but Richard Dean Anderson lives to see another day. Let’s take a look at today’s match-ups after the jump.
In the LED bracket, we have a face-off with the Young Indiana Jones against cult hero Buffy Summers. In the CRT bracket, we have a battle between two of TV’s most famous FBI agents. Fox Mulder takes on Agent Dale Cooper to see once and for all who owns the Bureau.
‘The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles’ was doomed from the start, simply because the show’s budget was too big for television. Still, to this day, the series remains atop many lists of most sought-after TV shows. The DVDs still fetch a high price, which is a testament to the staying power of Indiana Jones. On the other hand, who has more staying power than Buffy Summers? ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’ stayed around for seven seasons while Sarah Michelle Gellar defeated the world’s vampires and demons.
Young Indiana Jones – The ‘Chronicles’ were put together to flesh out what Indiana Jones must have been like when he was a youngster. Turns out he was every bit as cocky and curious as when he grew up into the world’s most famous relic hunter.
Strengths: Cunning, smarts and the power of reminiscing. Well, okay that last one is a trait of the older Indiana Jones, who was featured in this series as he told stories about himself as a child.
Weaknesses: It’s been a very long time since I’ve seen any of the ‘Young Indiana Jones’ episodes, but I’d assume that his weaknesses are the same as the older Indy – meaning snakes! Damn those snakes.
Buffy Summers – She’s defeated all manner of supernatural beasties and baddies. She’s a one-stop shop for monster killing. Being a Slayer is a lot of work, but Buffy is cut out for it. She’s one of the greatest television heroines of our time. Does young Indy even stand a chance?
Strengths: As a Slayer, Buffy gained all sorts of special, out-of-this-world powers like unmatched fighting skills. She’s durable, and has the ability to heal faster than normal people. Plus, she’s just a badass chick who kills vampires every day. You know, the usual.
Weaknesses: She’s constantly protecting the ones she loves from the evil forces in her life. But really, I think young Indy is completely overmatched here.
Two of TV’s most famous FBI agents throw down in the first round. One agent is trying to decipher the mystery behind a murder, while the other tries to decipher the mystery behind extraterrestrials. Both of them seem to have some experience with the supernatural. They’re both very adept at doing their jobs, but only one can survive and move on.
Strengths: Cooper has amazing powers of observation and is an out-of-the-box thinker. These skills could be useful in tricking his opponents. He also has a habit of wearing a bulletproof vest seemingly at all times, even when lounging in his hotel room.
Weaknesses: A bullet will put him down for a while, but not take him completely out. He’s vulnerable to possession by long-haired psycho killer spirits. He also gets easily distracted by cherry pie, donuts, and a damn fine cup of coffee.
Fox Mulder – Mulder spent nine seasons trying to find out the truth behind aliens. While on his journey, he ran across all manner of supernatural beast. At one point, he even crossed paths with a garbage monster from Native American folklore. He’s seen everything.
Strengths: Mulder never gives up on an investigation. His hunger for the truth drives him. He’s also very skilled at finding out what he needs to do to defeat the otherworldly bad guys that cross his path.
Weaknesses: Sometimes his drive gets him into trouble, as he wanders off on his own without backup. Also, my favorite running gag in ‘X Files’ was that Mulder is addicted to porn.