Well here we are, with just sixteen characters left in the Movie Madness tournament of death. It’s been a tough road, but we’ve finally identified the baddest characters in all of cinema. Okay, well, maybe some of them came down to popularity contests, but I think we can all agree that this final field of sixteen is a pretty formidable bunch.
Let’s start this off with a tough battle. Both of these guys have gone through some tough matchups to end up here. McClane has taken out James Bond, while Bourne has taken out both V and Ellen Ripley. These guys mean business. These guys know how to fight. These guys know what it takes to win.
John McClane – He just doesn’t die. Well, neither does Bourne, so there’s that. He’s got one-up on Bourne in the snarky department, though. Not only does he beat the crap out of bad guys, he spouts quite a few witty catchphrases along the way.
Secret Weapon: It’s no secret that McClane can do just about everything. He’s adept at using whatever is around him to his advantage. He made a holster out of duct tape, for heaven’s sake. McClane’s secret weapon is improvisation. He rushes headlong into a fight without ever formulating a plan. This could get lesser men into trouble, but this is McClane we’re talking about. Everything works out for him.
Jason Bourne – Assassin extraordinaire. It’s true that he can’t remember who he is, but he’s remembered all the important stuff: martial arts, weapons knowledge, and the ability to outsmart anyone in any given situation.
Secret Weapon: Bourne has been chasing his past for a long time, but he’s never given up. He’s full of that can-do spirit, which makes him almost impossible to beat. Oh, and have you seen his hand-to-hand combat skills? McClane has held his own in fist fights over the years, but I think that if this came down to a bare-knuckle brawl, Bourne has a huge edge over McClane.
John McClane vs. Jason Bourne
- John McClane (56%, 128 Votes)
- Jason Bourne (44%, 101 Votes)
Total Voters: 229
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Alex
I gotta give it to Bourne. He has all of the reluctant resourcefulness of McClane, plus professional assassin training on top of it. I think it’d be pretty hard to beat that.
Aaron Peck
AuthorThis is one of the toughest matchups of the tournament. I ultimately went with McClane, just because he seems like he’d be able to improvise something that gives him the edge. Also, he has much better catch phrases.
Alex
Hmm…catch phrases. I failed to consider those. Well played, Aaron. Well played.
Gareth Callenby
It’s not great video quality, but everyone deserves to see the trailer to Die Hard 12:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BRnH_rRnBAw
Aaron Peck
AuthorThanks for sharing. That was hilarious.
Shayne Blakeley
Hell yes! the Ben Stiller Show doesn’t get enough credit.
Shannon Nutt
Actually, I think in a “bare-knuckle brawl”, McClane would have the edge. It’s in every other skill that Bourne is superior…after all, Bourne is a trained assassin, while McClane’s only been trained as a NYPD cop.
Too bad this is just a movie character contest, because Jack Bauer would kick both these guys asses. 🙂
Luke Hickman
woah, woah, woah. Bauer wouldn’t have any ground on either of these guys. Bauer shoot, stabs and occasionally shocks people. He is better at yelling than anything. McClane has ridden on the wings of jets, blown up boats and launched cars into helicopters and Bourne could kill a man with a stuffed animal. Bourne all the way!
Josh Zyber
Luke, I’ll forgive you if you gave up watching 24 before the final season (the last few years were pretty lousy). But near the show’s end, Jack Bauer disembowled a guy on camera – just because he was in a bad mood. He earned serious badass points for that.
Luke Hickman
Maybe I should watch that episode! I gave up after season 4.
Josh Zyber
Ironically, you quit one season early. Season 5 was one of the show’s best, and then it went straight into the crapper immediately afterwards.
Aaron Peck
AuthorJack Bauer also went total Lost Boy on a terrorist and bit out the guy’s jugular. Bauer puts the “bad” in badass.
RBBrittain
Tough call, but I gotta go with McClane. If push comes to shove, he can just blow up whatever building Bourne’s in.
Sam Maw
McClain improvises; Jason Bourne breaks down every detail of every person he sees in case the prove themselves to be an enemy. I definitely give the upper hand to Bourne. Too bad the voters aren’t…
Josh Zyber
This is definitely one of the toughest matches so far. Ultimately, I think that McClane is just more resilient. Bourne beats his opponents through his training and superior fighting skills, but I don’t think he’s ever really taken a beating and come back from it the way McClane regularly does. He’ll eventually get tired of beating the crap out of McClane, and that’s just when McClane will strike back with one killer blow that will knock Bourne on his ass.
Mike Attebery
This makes me think of this book I’ve been hearing described as ‘Die Hard’ meets ‘The Office…’
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B0028K33GS
Shannon Nutt
I originally wanted to post that Bourne wouldn’t beat John McCain in a fight, let alone John McClane, but Jason deserves better than that.
I’m with Josh on this one…I see Bourne using all kinds of moves to knock McClane around, and then John saying something like “you swing like my sister” and head-butting Bourne into the next county.
João Guilherme
lol!
Initially I voted on Bourne, and actually always thought that him was the toughest guy someone had ever created in movies.
But I have to agree with you.
After “you swing like my sister” we would have “yippie kay hey!” 🙂