Movie Madness: Batman vs. John McClane

We’re barreling toward the conclusion of Movie Madness. On Wednesday, Batman took care of Alice pretty easily. Our final round features Batman versus John McClane, and Darth Vader versus Indiana Jones. This quite the epic Final Four of characters. Who’s going to take the championship? There’s only one way to find out.

Batman, fresh off his victory against Alice, is taking on John McClane. Alice couldn’t defeat Batman because too many people thought Batman would wipe the floor with her. Now we face a different choice. Can a pure badass like McClane take out Batman?

John McClane – Dude took out Voldemort! Not saying I agree with it, but he did. Muggle blood be damned, McClane showed the dark lord of wizardy what was up. Now McClane faces a very human opponent in Batman. Under that rubbery suit, he’s still Batman, and McClane still blows things up. This should be an interesting matchup.



Batman – He took out Alice and now he has his sights set on McClane, a man who more than dabbles in dispatching his opponents to the afterlife, he relishes it. However, Batman is just as resourceful as McClane. With an endless line of bat-gadgets at his disposal, will he be able to pull off another win?

Final Word: Both of these guys are capable and inventive. They’re able to use the world around them to get the job done. McClane relies heavily on firearms, which could be a weakness. Batman has never been slowed down by bullets. (That could be attributed to the horrible marksmen that henchmen make.) McClane is a much better marksmen, and even though the batsuit seems to deflect bullets like crazy, Batman’s mouth area isn’t covered. It’s easy to see McClane putting a perfectly placed bullet right in the Caped Crusader’s gob.

John McClane vs. Batman

  • Batman (70%, 91 Votes)
  • John McClane (30%, 39 Votes)

Total Voters: 130

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  1. Oh man, I just don’t know! I’m rooting for McClane, but I think realistically that Batman would take him.

    I’d also rather see a final match between Batman and Darth Vader than John McClane and Vader (assuming that Vader beats Indiana Jones, of course).

    I can’t believe I just said “realistically” in a post about a made-up fight between Batman and John McClane. 🙂

  2. vihdeeohfieuhl

    There’s simply nothing that McClane can do that would deter Batman in any way. In a stand up fight, McClane couldn’t even land a blow. If he tries to shoot Batman…well, we’ve seen how effective that is.

    C’mon! It’s a miracle that McClane has made it this far. I guess I can buy him beating a magical wizard who could care less about him, and has no desire to kill him.

    There’s no way in hell he can beat Batman. There’s absolutely nothing he can do to gain an advantage.

    • besides SHOOT HIM IN THE FACE where there’s no mask?

      obvious answer. SHOOT HIM IN THE FACE!!!!! Batman does NOT have superhuman speed. he can’t DODGE a bullet. he can be protected by them, but his eye sockets and mouth are exposed.

      • I liked your point. Although all those battles are as made-up as it gets, I think if we have to really stop and think about how a battle between the 2 characters would be, this is the kind of reasoning we should make.

        Although, your point is valid only if we assume that Mclane would be the one to take the first action, and also, that Batmant would expose himself and give Mclane a chance to shoot at him. As Batman is probably the master of sneaking, probably Mclane would be caught from behind.

        One last remark: if I remember correctly, when Aaron created this tournament, the idea was to think about a fight to the death. So Batman would always loose unless we make an exception for him, since he does not kill anyone.

        • For the purposes of this tournament, I think we need to suspend a little disbelief enough to assume that all of these characters have really good reasons for wanting/needing to kill each other, even if they’re not inclined to do so under normal circumstances.

  3. “My sister has an outfit like that!”

    I can totally see McClane taking down the Dark Knight. They’re basically the same kind of bad-ass, but John doesn’t have a billion dollars and a need to hide behind a mask.

    • Alex

      The mask is Bruce’s mode of psychological warfare against those he brings down. Absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. Any way you slice this one, John McClane is still an NYC cop and Batman always seems to make very short work of the Gotham PD when they get in his way.