TV Madness: Northman vs. Locke – Worf vs. Capone

Friday’s TV Madness brought us a very close race between Al Swearengen and Titus Pullo. As of this writing, Swearengen has a meager lead over Pullo by only a few votes. If that holds up by the time this entry is published, Swearengen will move onto the next round of the tournament. In the other match-up, Sonny Crockett handled Jarod from ‘The Pretender’ with relative ease.

Now here’s an interesting match-up. Yes, I know one of the competitors is a vampire with superhuman powers, but the other is a man who’s been endowed with all sorts of supernatural mojo after he landed on a mysterious island. Both of them have experience with powers that aren’t natural to this world, so they make for a good pairing.

Eric Northman – As vampire sheriff, Eric is tasked with keeping the peace in the vampire world of the American South. He’s been around for a millennia or so, and has gained quite a bit of fighting skills over that time period.




Strengths: Well, besides all the intrinsic vampire powers (super-strength, super-speed, super-coolness), Eric started out life as a Viking warrior, so the dude has been in his share of battles over time. He knows how to handle himself in a fight, and with his vampiric powers, his fighting skills are quite amazing. They have to be if he’s going to keep all of those egomaniacal, blood-crazed vampires from killing everything in sight.

Weaknesses: Along with vampire strengths come weaknesses: sunlight, fire, wooden stakes, silver, decapitation, etc. These are things that Eric, along with all other ‘True Blood’ vampires, are susceptible to.

John Locke – He was paralyzed, and then he crash-landed on a mysterious island only to find out that he could walk again. After that, Locke became the Magellan of the ‘Lost’ island. He explored, tracked and discovered many of the island’s numerous secrets. Let’s all be glad that Locke was around to counteract the sniveling mess that was Jack Shepard.



Strengths: What can’t he do? He’s the complete package. Mysteriously healed by the island, Locke was imbued with mythological powers from an unseen force. His old man exterior is misleading. Inside, he’s a knife-wielding badass who stands up to anyone who gets in his way, even if that someone is a giant entity made of smoke. Oh, and let’s not forget that Locke can walk around freely in sunlight without the least bit of harm. That could come in handy while hunting vampires frightened of daylight.

Weaknesses: Don’t tell him what he can’t do! Well, there are a few things that cause Locke to stumble, but none as glaring as all the stuff that can kill a vampire. Locke is haunted by his past and has been known to die, although coming back to life as Evil Locke isn’t totally out of the question either.

Eric Northman vs. John Locke

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The world’s most famous gangster goes up against the universe’s most famous ridge-headed alien. I wonder which way this one will go. Capone has a nasty demeanor, that’s for sure, but can it stand a chance against a warlike snarling Klingon?

Al Capone – On ‘Boardwalk Empire’, Capone is just starting out. He’s finding his footing as a gangster. Soon he’ll be running Chicago and everyone in it. He’s mean, and kills without conscience.




Strengths: He’s a cold-blooded killer, which comes in handy in a tournament that requires the participants to go all ‘Hunger Games’ on each other. He’s also pretty devious. He can set up and execute assassinations easily.

Weaknesses: Well, coming from the early part of the 1900s isn’t going to help him much, especially when he’s fighting a character who has access to weapons and technology from the distant future.

Worf – Klingons are a warlike people, but Worf has a soft spot in his heart. He found a role on the Enterprise crew and largely left his mean Klingon days behind him in trade for a life of following around Captain Picard.




Strengths: The Klingon fighting spirit never goes away. Worf still has the blood of one of the surliest alien races running through him. He still knows how to fight and has access to phasers, along with any sort of weird, deadly weapon that the Klingon race can think up.

Weaknesses: Worf isn’t as mean and nasty as the rest of his race. There’s something that makes him want to settle down. This could create a small opportunity for a ruthless opponent to get the jump on him.

Al Capone vs. Worf

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  1. I hate to vote against Locke, but I think Eric outmatches him here. Locke is pretty easily manipulated and Eric is pretty manipulative, simple as that (also I really want him to go up against Buffy.) Worf by a landslide.

  2. Eric over Locke for the reasons Shayne gave.

    I don’t watch Boardwalk Empire, but I’ll vote for Capone. I assume that he’s portrayed as your usual vicious gangster type. As far as Klingons go, Worf is pretty much a big wuss. He snarls a good deal, but when it comes down to it, he’s all bark and no bite.

  3. Locke vs Northman, I vote Locke. I was never a huge fan of lost, but I still don’t see how a semi-supernatural character who can get through all the impossible things he does, can lose against a vampire with so many easily exploitable weaknesses. He probably wouldn’t even kill Northman himself, he’d manoeuvre someone else into doing it for him.

    Capone vs Worf, easily Worf. I’ve never been much of a Trek fan, but I just have no love of gangsters, possibly the most over-rated and boring film and TV characters ever to have endless films/programs made about them. And for all his flaws, Worf is pretty cool as far the Trek universe goes. Heck, he’s probably already beaten Capone half a dozen times on the holodeck!!

  4. I had to vote against Locke as well…great character, but let’s be honest…he was always getting tricked and/or getting beat up (or shot…or killed!). Eric would/could take him easily.

  5. Alex

    Went for Worf on this one.

    Capone sends one of his to sickbay, Worf sends one of his to the morgue. That’s the Klingon way!

    Capone brings a knife to a bat’leth fight.

    I could keep going…

  6. To be fair, the Capone on Boardwalk is easily the weakest incarnation. If it had been DeNiro’s version from 1987’s The Untouchables, he might’ve even had a chance at cracking Worf’s skull in.

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