Now Playing: Big Shock, ‘Monte Carlo’ Is for Teen Girls Only

I hate it when a movie limits its audience to one tiny demographic. It’s no wonder why something like Disney’s ‘Prom’ (from earlier this year) flopped at the box office. The studio made a movie exclusively for teenybopper girls ranging from ages 15 to 18. Appealing to such a tiny audience, movies like these are never going to be very big. Starring a teen actress whose only claims to fame are being in tons of Disney Channel programs and dating that annoying Bieber kid, ‘Monte Carlo’ is worthy of being clumped with those failure flicks that lack audience appeal.

No joke, I had never seen Selena Gomez (‘The Wizards of Waverly Place’) until the ‘Monte Carlo’ press screening. I’d heard the name during “Celebrity Scoop” on the radio, but had never actually seen her in anything. With a face that’s perpetually frowning unless she’s forcing a smile and looking 12-years-old (she’s really 18), I don’t see where the male draw comes from.

If you saw a trailer for it and thought that ‘Monte Carlo’ looked like little more than a Disney Channel movie on the big screen, then you were right. Three girls set out on a vacation across Paris when one of them (Gomez) is mistaken for a wealthy heiress. Instead of shirking it off and continuing on their already-paid vacation, they decide to parade around, playing the part and spending the real girl’s money.

Just like ‘Mr. Popper’s Penguins’, there are no consequences for the characters’ actions. They get into some trouble with the police chief of Monte Carlo, but there isn’t a single repercussion for anything they do. If anything, they’re rewarded for their terrible behavior. Identity theft, impersonation and general dishonesty lead to a lifetime of happiness.

Alongside ‘Gossip Girl’ starlets Leighton Meester and Katie Cassidy, Selena Gomez seems like nothing more than a bad kid actor. Not that Meester and Cassidy are great by any means, by they each have had experiences in real filmmaking – not just made-for-television kids’ movies.

Fans of Gomez, teen movies like ‘The Sisterhood of Traveling Pants’ (which ‘Monte Carlo’ picks on, for some reason) and 15-year-old girls may love ‘Monte Carlo’. Every other audience will find it sub-par, long and boring. The only negative side to reviewing movies is having to sit through stuff like this.

Rating: ★½☆☆☆

6 comments

    • My thoughts exactly! It reminds me of a time I was in a press screening that canceled a regular showing of Aquamarine. Four big old grown males entered the theater with Aquamarine tickets purchased online. Of course, they were quickly escorted out by security. Tell me THAT’S not creepy!

  1. I hate to contradict you, Luke, but I know a 12-year-old girl who is very excited for this movie. So you see, it has much broader appeal than you give it credit for. It appeals to BOTH tweens and teens. 🙂

  2. Whats really sad is that something like this actually got a half of a star more from you than Transformers 3 did…..

    I dont care how bad Transformers 3 could be, its infinitely better than junk like this!

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