‘Legends’ 1.03 Recap: “He’s Not That Good”

TNT’s ‘Legends’ started off as a pretty big disappointment. By the third episode, it seems clear that the show isn’t going to get much (if any) better. I may be ready to call it quits on this one.

For what it’s worth, here’s what happens in Episode 3:

Martin is undercover as Nicolas Cage. Well, actually, he’s undercover as flashy arms dealer Dante Auerbach, who acts like he’s Nicolas Cage in that movie ‘Lord of War’. To make sure you get the connection, the episode is called ‘Lords of War’ – even though there’s only one lord-of-war character in the episode, so there’s no need for the plural.

The Russian chemist is still being held by Chechen mobsters, who are forcing him to make VX nerve gas for them. “Dante” meets up with an old contact and tells him that he needs to make a big score. Wouldn’t you know it, some nerve gas would be just the thing that his clients are dying (or killing) to get their hands on. How convenient.

Since Dante claims to be buying, his buddy brings him to a woman named Ana Paulanos (Necar Zadegan from Season 8 of ’24’), who’s acting as broker for the Chechens. The plot of this show is really getting bogged down in middle-men.

Ana is kind of hot, and Dante’s supposed to be a playboy, so when she gets flirty-flirty with him, he has to have sex with her to maintain his cover. Oh, the sacrifices this guy will make for his country…

Anyway, through plot machinations that aren’t terribly important (genius hacker girl Tina Majorino uses a super high-tech word cloud at one point… really), the episode culminates with an FBI raid on the warehouse housing the illegal chemical lab. They rescue the chemist, but the VX is gone. In order to locate it, Martin/Dante convinces Ana that he needs to meet the evil Russian in charge of the mobsters, a guy named Col. Medved. (I take it that someone on the writing staff for this show is not a fan of ‘Sneak Previews’. Perhaps next week they can introduce the devious Gen. Lyons.) To make him prove that he’s not a narc, Medved demands that Dante drop some poison into the eye of an underling who had presumably done something wrong and needed punishing. The episode ends with Dante about to do that.

Meanwhile, when he’s not acting as Dante, Martin seems to be cracking up from the pressures of his job and his doubts about his own identity. It probably doesn’t help that Agent Rice (Morris Chestnut) won’t give up his vendetta and secret investigation into Martin’s affairs.

Ultimately, the episode doesn’t accomplish much in terms of plot. The show’s just not interesting enough or frankly good enough to keep me invested in a serial storyline parsed out over multiple episodes. I may give the series one more week in the hopes that it finally kicks into gear, but only because I’m feeling generous and the fall season shows haven’t started airing yet.


  1. Bryan

    I really like Sean Bean, but I gave up on this show after the pilot. I wanted it to be good (the ads certainly made it look like a quality show) but there just wasn’t enough to bring me back for more.

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